Jens2Cents

Postpartum Depression, Writing & My (Almost) 30 Year Old Soul

Posted on: 07/31/2014

Just a lonely girl, starting in the bloggy world…

When I originally started this blog, I was bored. Each time that I picked it up to continue, it was more or less for the same reason. This time was a bit different and so far, I’ve stuck with it. What’s different now? I’m caught in the clutches of Postpartum Depression & nothing I’ve done over the past 9 months has totally fixed it.

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Plastering on a smile around Christmas

When I was younger, writing was a constant outlet. I wrote poems, stories, songs, letters (some not intended to even be seen); if I thought it, I wrote it. Somewhere along the last decade, I lost this habit and I believe it has been a great source of my pain. My hope is that having a constant outlet to focus on will keep me from shutting myself off to the world as I have been doing the last several months.

I haven’t decided exactly what I want this blog to be about & that has caused me some confusion. Do I focus on our home/family life? While it is a huge part of me (the biggest part actually), it is not the only part of me. I desperately need to tease that thread of individualism back out. Who needs focus? (This is a blog for me obviously as I’ve told none of my friends or family about it really.) An outlet is not much good if you hold back, so while the overall tone of this blog will be “family”, there will be a few posts that are just “Jen”.

In a few weeks, I will turn thirty. This seems to always be a huge point in people’s lives & mine is no different. Three weeks later my eldest child will be fifteen, the age I was when she was born, and I will have been a mother for half of my life. Being a mother is something I cherish, but hitting this milestone makes me see how little of myself I’ve recognized over the years.

I hope you’ll join me as I continue to share about my family & try to rediscover myself.

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